Isamaya: hey dad how are you

13:57 Mike: just my usual self, peering from a sea of troubles..

13:58 & u?

Isamaya comes online to see mike is logged on.

11:50 Isamaya: u ok dad?

  was gonna call you yesterday

 Mike: mostly

11:51 Isamaya: thats not 100 percent

  so thats not good

  whats up

 Mike: I'm smiling..

 Isamaya: good

  We've got mice..

11:52 Mike: struggling with the web stuff - but it's taking shape.

  got a broken tooth - but it's sealed, so not so bad

11:53 Jame's friend Claire is coming climbing with us

 Isamaya: cool

11:54 i haven't been a few weeks cos of my knee

 Mike: don't tell me!!What have you done?

 Isamaya: um...

11:55 had a bit of an issue with a van last week

11:56 Mike: last week is not a few weeks, do you mean you're not able for a few weeks?

 Isamaya: no

  its fine

  just got slammed and landed on my kneecap and elbow

11:57 luckily, it was such a bloody cold day

  i couldt walk so i just got back on my bike

  and started riding

  and it brought down the swelling

  and its ok now

  twinges

  a bit

11:58 Mike: my knees often twinge - but i'm a bit older

 Isamaya: no but this was cos of the accident

 Mike: up stairs is worst

11:59 Isamaya: yeh

Isamaya is in the kitchen trying to make some lunch. She is looking around in the cupboard with canned items and pasta etc.

Mike walks in and leans against the door frame observing her.

Mike: Lost something?

Isamaya: No, just looking for something for lunch.

Mike: Well, can you stop scrabbling around, because I had organised all of that.

Isamaya: ?

Isamaya: Have you come in here to watch me?

Mike: Oh don't be so ridiculous.

Isamaya: Then what are you doing hovering around like that?

Mike: Minding my own business, what are you doing?

Isamaya: Look, can I throw this can of popcorn away because its out of date.

Mike: No, and what do you deem as out of date?

Isamaya: Its best before date was 3 years before I was born?

Mike: And?

Isamaya: It went out of date in 1985 Dad.

Mike: The Titanic sank in 1912 but they found cans on the ship a few years ago and the food was still edible.

Mike: Are there any signs of contamination.

Isamaya: No, but its covered in dust and the can is going rusty.

Isamaya: I'm throwing it away.

Mike: You have no right throwing away my things.

Isamaya: Are you serious?! look, can you just stop sanding there, watching over me please!

Mike: Just mind your own business Isamaya, I'm waiting for you to move so I can make some popcorn.

Isamaya's phone has stopped working and she has arranged to meet a friend in 20 minutes. She logs onto her email to find Mike is online. She sends him an email asking him to send a text to her friend to let her know where she will meet her and at what time.                                                                                        14:15me: did you get my email 14:16 Mike: just saw it   can't you log on?  me: no  Mike: why not?  me: dunno 14:17 Mike: have you ever logged on?  me: don' tknow why it's not working  Mike: have you ever logged on?  me: yeh   mate! 14:18 why is it charging me so much! 14:19 Mike: there's a bill here - maybe the last one - are you ok with me opening it?  me: you have already opened it. 14:20 if I send you a message, can you text someone for me   it's a french number   and I can't text off my phone now   would you mind  Mike: this is dated jul 2nd   it has 26 pages 14:21 me: please send this: mon telephone ne fonctionne pas bien. mon bureau est sur la route. Je vais vous répondre à 5 @ 60 Great Eastern Street - Il est dans le coin? txt mon mobile BISOUXX   (that was the message) 14:22 the number is +3368834272 14:23 is that ok  Mike: I think you've been scammed 14:24   telephone 3 and make sure you have all the details written down and ready 14:25 they have a legal department who should be able to help   presumably you sent the text back? 14:28 me: which text   which text   i'm trying to meet a friend at 5 dad 14:29 and i cannot send them a text   becausemy phone bill is so high   i'ts not letting me make calls or msgs 14:31 please can you send that message to them  Mike insists that Isamaya logs onto her phone account to try and rectify the problem. She does and then goes back to chat to Mike. 20 minutes 5 minutes 14:58 me: did u send that message  Mike: not yet 14:59 your last 3 bills are £330. You need to take yourself into a quiet corner and have a LOUD word with yourself   I'm sending you the bills   the last bill remains unpaid. 15:00 me: I just don't understand   how i can have gone over the call timeI really need to send that message.. ae you going to do it or shall I ask someone else?  Mike: If it has been refused by the bank there will be charges for that too 15:02 er......maybe you do.. 15:03 me: what   don't b arsy   i'm screwing up   cos it means i have NO money in my bank?!  Mike: there's also a fair usage policy on txts i think so maybe that takes u over  me: I have rent to pay 15:05 Im going to have to go to the bank and ask for an overdraft  Mike: maybe you need to come down to earth a bit - start by checking all your accounts and seeing exactly where you stand 15:06 i've tried very hard to get u to do a cash flo forecast - i'm not aware that you've ever done one 15:07 i'll help you, but i can only do that if you want to help yourself  me: ok yes i need help   but PLEASE can you send the text   or I wont be able to meet my friend from paris 13 minutes 15:21 me: is it sent dad 6 minutes 15:27 Mike: calm down - yes just 15:28 me: THANK YOU   zz   xxx 6 minutes 15:35 Mike: fyi   "Gros bisous" if you write to family (mainly if youre a child). "Je t'embrasse" in every case. You can also add : "Je t'embrasse bien fort" :)

Isamaya receives an email from Mike entitled 'Brain Exercises'

Brain exercises

''Memory, like muscular strength, is a “use it or lose it” proposition. The more you work out your brain, the better you’ll be able to process and remember information.
Novelty and sensory stimulation are the foundation of brain exercise. If you break your routine in a challenging way, you’re using brain pathways you weren’t using before. This can involve something as simple as brushing your teeth with your nondominant hand, which activates little-used connections on the nondominant side of your brain. Or try a “neurobic” exercise – an aerobic exercise for your brain – (seeKeep Your Brain Alive Exercise) that forces you to use your faculties in unusual ways, like showering and getting dressed with your eyes closed. Take a course in a subject you don’t know much about, learn a new game of strategy, or cook up some recipes in an unfamiliar cuisine. That’s the most effective way to keep your synapses firing.''

Mike: That was just an excerpt. I expect you to follow the link.

Isamaya receives an email from Mike, entitled 'Serious Stuff'.
The email goes on to read:

On 25 November 2010 23:57, Mike wrote:

New updated COLOUR version here:

http://www.equipped.com/FM3-05.70SURVIVALMANUAL.pdf

Dad
x

It is Kerstyns birthday. Everyone is throwing her a surprise party at the All Star Bowling Lanes.
In order for the surprise to work, everyone has to be at the Lanes at 2.50pm so when she arrives at 3pm, they can all shout happy birthday.

It is 2:55 and Mike arrives at Kerstyns house an hour late.
Everyone has their Jackets on and is ready to leave for bowling.

Ian comes into the kitchen to find find Mike squatting on a child's stool next to the oven, grilling bread.

Ian: We need to go
Mike: I'm just having my breakfast.
Ian: It's almost 3pm
Mike: Yes, breakfastime.